People who have been protected and habitually given whatever they need, develop an "entitlement mentality" and always consider themselves first. They put themselves ahead of their accomplishments and many of them do not strive hard at all. If ever they do, it would be at their convenience. 

Many of these people have been spoon-fed and have become parasites. When their interest is threatened, they resent and tend to pass on the blame. They are so engrossed in their own world that they become vulnerable to the evils of greed, envy, anger, lust etc..

They may achieve good results and maybe successful for a while, but eventually will not feel a sense of accomplishment nor satisfaction. Much of their activities are nothing more than a cheap anesthetic to deaden the soreness of selfish-anticipation, unchallenging, unfulfilled and seemingly empty life.

It is our job as parents to guide our children's behavior, but it can sometimes be challenging to find the right balance of love and discipline.

If we happen to be this kind of protective parent or benefactor, it is time to ask the question, whether we did/do love or destroy them.

Jackie Chan will donate all his money to charity so his son can earn his own worth. He said: "If he is capable, he can make his own money. If he is not, then he will just be wasting my money."

However, there are many individuals who, in spite of having been nurtured abundantly, have taken advantage of their good fortune; have carried out and fulfilled successfully the dream of their parents for them. Most of them turn out to be grateful and generous people; and they show their gratitude by passing along love and kindness to others in many loving ways.

Here is a narrative of a nurtured but grateful son who became aware of his mother's sacrifice for him after applying for a job and he vowed to fulfill his mother's aspirations and pass along her kindheartedness to other people.

As the story goes, one young academically excellent person went for an interview for a managerial position in a big company. He passed the first interview; but in that company, the director did the last interview, and made the final decision.

The director discovered  that the youth's academic result was excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never was there a year he did not score. The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarship in school?" and  the youth answered, "no."

The  director asked, "Where did your mother work?" The youth answered, "my mother worked as cloth cleaner."

The director requested the youth to show his hands and the youth showed a pair of hands that was smooth and perfect to the director.

The director asked, "Did you ever help your mother wash clothes before?" The youth answered, "never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books, furthermore, my mother could wash clothes faster than I could."

The director said, I have a request, when you go back today, go and help clean your mother's hand, and then see me tomorrow morning.

The youth felt that the chance of landing the job was high and when he went back, he happily wanted to clean his mother's hand.  His mother felt strange. With happiness mixed with fear, she showed her hands to the kid.

No matter how high we have scaled educationally, professionally and/or  socially, we are a failure if we do not have a good relationship with our parents.

The youth cleaned his mother's hand slowly and his tears fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother's hands were so wrinkled, and that there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that she shuddered when his mother's hands were cleaned with water.

It was the first time that the youth realized and experienced that it is this pair of hands that washed the clothes every day to earn him the school fees and that the bruises in the mother's hand were the price that the mother paid for his graduation and academic excellence and probably his future.

Next morning, the youth went to the director's office. The director noticed the tear in the youth's eye and asked: "Can you tell me what you did and learned yesterday in your house?" The youth answered, "I cleaned my mother's hands and also finished washing all the remaining clothes."

The directors asked, "Please tell me what you felt." The youth said: "Number 1, I know what appreciation is now. Without my mother, I would not be successful today.  Number 2, now I know how to work together with my mother. Only now do I realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done.  Number 3, I know the importance and value of family relationship."

The director said, "This is what I want. I want to recruit a person who can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the suffering of others to get things done, and a person who would not put money as his only goal in life to be my manager. You are hired."

Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates, every employee worked diligently and as a team and the company improved tremendously.  And as you guess correctly, he's on his way up in the corporate ladder of fame and recognition.

Many of us have fortunate lives, but although we have been born in fortunate circumstances we tend to take a lot for granted. We have privileges and benefits, and a much better life than a good portion of people in the world can ever hope to expect. There's a lot to be grateful for, a lot to feel gratitude for.

By Tim Pedrosa

Nowadays, there is a trend to blame our mother for everything that went wrong in our life. Instead of expressing our gratitude to her, we focus on what she had done to cause us to suffer. We do not realize that suffering is a natural thing for human beings. Of course she is not perfect, she was not a perfectly enlightened being when she had us, so naturally there were things she could have improved on.

Tim