When we only think of our own self and activities without showing interest in others, our self-absorption in all its forms, kills empathy, understanding and compassion. Our world shrinks as our problems and preoccupations loom larger. But when we focus on others, our world expands; our own problems drift to the periphery of the mind and becomes smaller, and we increase our capacity for connection and compassionate attitude.

Selfish people do not waste their energies in considering the good of others. Love is nowhere found in their consciousness. It is love that is always ready to deny itself, to give, to sacrifice; and is measured by its sincerity and intensity.

Love is self-forgetfulness. Hence where there is love, unselfishness prevails. We forget ourselves and live for others. But where there is selfishness it spoils joy. One selfish soul will destroy the sweetness of life around us. It is like an ugly bush in the midst of a garden of flowers. It is selfishness that could ruin all the loveliness of our relationships. We need to guard again this kind of spirit.

This focus on money and power may do wonders in the marketplace, but it creates tremendous crisis in our society. People who have spent all day learning how to sell themselves and to manipulate others are in no position to form lasting friendships or intimate relationships...

However many of us still see the world in different prospective. We hunger for a different kind of society, one based on principles of caring, ethical and spiritual sensitivity, and communal solidarity.

We are all self-centered in today's world and that often leads to selfishness like the man in the following narrative. But with proper spirituality, we could turn to be kind and charitable people and lead a happy and satisfying life.
A man once became rich and his lifestyle changed. Previously, he gave charity, cared for others and helped them as much as he could.  Now he had become hard-hearted and miserly. He cared only for himself and never had time for others.

One day, he was visited by his wise old professor who had taught him in college about acts of kindness…..The rich man showed off his beautiful home and boasted to the professor about his wealth.

Perceiving the change in his former student, the professor called him to the window. Pointing to the outside, he asked, "What do you see?"

"I see poor people passing to and fro trying to earn a living," he replied.

Walking over to a large mirror the professor told his rich student to look in. "Now what do you see?"

"Myself, of course."

"I don't understand," said the professor. "Both the window and the mirror are made of glass. Yet when you look through the window, you see the poor people outside but when you look at the mirror, you see only yourself!"

"The reason is simple!" said the rich man. "The mirror has a silver coating which prevents you from seeing through. However, the window has no silver coating, so you can see through"

“Interesting,” the professor said, “Both the window and the mirror have glass. But the glass of the mirror is covered with a little bit of silver. And no sooner is the silver added than you cease to see others, and you see only yourself.” Maybe you'd be better off without the silver!"

Sometimes our troubles begin when a bit of silver was added into our lives, and we start looking at and stop looking through.

Our selfishness can usually be traced to our selfish motive to boost or enrich ourselves. It is a trait we hate in other people but justify in ourselves.

The only things standing between us and the compassionate, wise, and creative person we want to be are matters of choice. Our choice. No one can occupy our kindness except us.

By Tim Pedrosa