See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil. Do not even think evil, because first you think of something, then you speak of it, then you see it.

There was a very old Chinese Zen story that reflects the thinking of many people today. We encounter many unpleasant things in our lives, they irritate us and they make us angry.

Sometimes, they cause us a lot of hurt, sometimes they cause us to be bitter or jealous. Yet we are not willing to let them go away. We keep on carrying the baggage of unpleasant experience with us. We let them keep on coming back to hurt us, make us angry, make us bitter and cause us a lot of agony.
Once upon a time a big monk and a little monk were traveling together. They came to the bank of a river and found the bridge was damaged. They had to wade across the river. There was a pretty woman who was stuck at the damaged bridge and could not cross the river. The big monk offered to carry the pretty woman across the river on his back. The woman accepted.

The little monk was shocked by the move of the big monk. "How can big disciple brother carry a woman when we are supposed to avoid all intimacy with females?" thought the little monk. But he kept quiet.

The big monk carried the lady across the river and the small monk followed unhappily. When they crossed the river, the big monk let the woman down and they parted ways with her.

All along the way for several miles, the little monk was making up all kinds of accusations about the big monk in his head. This got him madder and madder. But he still kept quiet. And the big monk had no inclination to explain his situation.

Finally, at a rest point many hours later, the little monk could not stand it any further, he burst out angrily at the big monk, "How can you claim yourself a devout monk, when you seize the first opportunity to touch a female, especially when she is very pretty?  

All your teachings to me make you a big hypocrite." The big monk looked surprised and said, "I had put down the pretty woman at the river bank many hours ago, how come you are still carrying her along?"

Many of us are not willing to put down or let go of the baggage that we carry. We should let go immediately after the unpleasant event is over. This will immediately remove all our agonies. There is no need to be further hurt by the unpleasant event after it is over.

Holding onto anger is like holding onto a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you're the one who gets burned. Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind. Be slow to speak and quick to listen...

The more anger that we carry in our heart, the less capable we are of making sound judgment. We should not look back unless it is to derive useful lessons from past event. It is just that simple.

Tim