We never truly appreciate the things our parents did for us until we start doing the same things for our children and then we realize that it is much easier to become a father than to be one.

Although many of us have not experienced having a father; our father passed away early in life or vanished for whatever reason, life gives us a great opportunity to experience fatherhood in many ways. A child may hold our hand even only for a little while but he/she will hold our hearts for a lifetime.

1.     We spend years wishing our parents would get off our back, only to realize they're the  ones who ever really had our back.-Unknown

Most of us try very hard to give our family the best things possible. However, many things could come to pass while raising a family. Many events happen beyond our control, for instance, the influence of the in-laws for selfish reasons, that prevent us from carrying out the best possible ways for our children. 

If we had done our very best, there should not be any regrets. Life must go on. God has many mysterious ways of touching our lives and strengthening our faith. Sometimes He creates space in our lives to teach us a lesson or so He can place something that is appropriate for us and we should be grateful. He always gives us the opportunity to pick up a better one, when He drops something or someone in our lives.

Nevertheless, we always have the opportunity to cherish and enjoy the wonderful memories of raising our children specially in our golden years. We learn that good things do not always last forever. Children grow-up, have their own families or are separated from their parents for various reasons.

We learn that well-brought-up, respectable and decent people are sensible and grateful enough to consider what their parents have done for them. Their love, sacrifice and dedication have undoubtedly prepared them for their own journey; their wisdom, knowledge and insights would certainly guide them in their own parenting expeditions. Let us discuss some of them:

1.      Live so that when your children think of fairness and integrity, they think of you. ~H.Jackson Brown

Good parenting requires a proper balance of love and discipline because love without discipline is false; discipline without love is force. Love must be plentiful and abundant, but developing values is very important as well, as too much indulgence and pampering would undermine our drive and motivation in building a better life.

The road of life is ours alone. Others may walk it with us but no one can walk it for us. We should never expect nor depend too much on anybody because even our shadow leaves us when we are in darkness. A person who has been pampered too much is a weak person, afraid to stand on his/her own and expect support from others.

Our destiny is a matter of choice; it is not a matter of chance. It is not something to wait for but something to work for. It is when we are in this frame of mind that we are on the right path to be a good father and successful person.

Upbringing is a result of love, patience and wisdom and the last two allow love to rule. Being a role model is the most powerful form of educating our children. Youngsters need good models more than they need critics. Itís one of a parentís greatest responsibilities and opportunities.

The worst action a parent can take is to be a false witness and sow discord in order to alienate the children from the other party in a broken family. A decent parent should avoid reprisal or ill feeling to satisfy a selfish motive, but should develop goodwill and compassion in the hearts of the children. Such selfishness would only make everybody a loser, specially the children.

Most of us worry about our children too much. Once they are grown-up, parents donít have to be concerned about them for children will have their own destiny and find their own way. Parents should not allow their children to use them unless necessary; they should not expect too much from them either.

I would prefer to give wings to the children. I would leave the child alone so that he/she would learn how to fly on his/her own. Good parents give their children roots and wings. Roots to know where home is, wings to fly away and exercise what has been taught them.

Most of us usually identify our parents with God, whether they want the role or not. Most people ďseeĒ God the way they perceive their parents.

What a higher form of respect, kindness and gratitude we can demonstrate if we go out of our way to shower our parents with love and attention. Let us be good to them and pray for their well being, peace, happiness and comfort specially in their old age. Our children will do the same to us when we reach their age.

 By Tim Pedrosa


      Being a role model is the most powerful form of educating our children. Youngsters need good models more than they need critics. Itís one of a parentís greatest responsibilities and opportunities.- John Wooden

Tim